There is No Try

I'm a bit of stickler for language.

If you've ever been to Spurling, chances are you know that I have a few rules about the rhetoric we use at the gym. I'm incredibly sensitive to language (and just in general, let's be honest...)

Maybe it’s because I was an English major and Dr. Minot, my senior writing professor, hammered home lessons like – “the word utilize is dumb. There is nowhere that you use the world utilize that you couldn’t also use the word use.”

I’m not sure he said it quite like that, but it’s been 22 years and I’m paraphrasing. Anyway, I can’t hear the word utilize without thinking of Dr. Minot and reflexively replacing it with use.

Language matters. That’s why when you come to the gym and tell me that you “only” did three sets, I instinctively repeat that you did three sets.

If you tell me that you "just lifted 15 pounds" I say that you lifted 15 pounds.

Last week when I was driving in to work, I was listening to the book “The Gift” by Dr. Edith Eger she talked about using the word “trying” when it comes to taking action on something.

“If you’re trying, it means you’re not doing and you’re letting yourself off the hook. You’re either doing or not doing.”

Ohhhhh suh-nap. Dr. Eger is a sweet woman in her 90’s but she was calling a spade a spade on that one. And it's soooo true.

I realize that this isn’t a new concept – I mean I’m not a Star Wars fan (sorry B-Mart..) but even I know the famous quote from Yoda. “Do or do not. There is no try.”

But something about the why Dr. Eger phrased it - letting yourself off the hook and giving yourself an out - really stood out to me. Because I say it all of the time to myself, and I often hear it from clients.

I'm going to try and get three workouts in this week.

I hope to stick to my nutrition plan for the month of January.

Recently, I caught myself telling someone that I’m hoping to have my new book published by March. What that means is that I’m not totally committed to doing the work I need to be doing now to have the book out by March.

It’s that simple. If I’m being honest with myself, I can absolutely have my book done by March. But if I keep saying that I'm hoping to have it done, I'm just feeding my inner procrastinator, and that monkey doesn't need any help at all.

Yes, I’m peeing myself a little thinking about how much work I need to do for the book to be finished, but I’m either committed or not committed.

And I need to be aware of the way I’m thinking about this process, even at a subconscious level.

That’s why language matters so much. Because what we say to ourselves and aloud directly affects our actions.