The Myth of Motivation

Human behavior fascinates me.

One of the reasons I enjoy coaching is that we are constantly trying to solve the puzzle that is human behavior.

What makes one person successful where nine other people struggle? How is it that one person can get up every morning and take their vitamins and go to the gym when another person in very similar circumstances struggles?

When you ask the person who was struggling to adopt habit change what they needed to succeed, the answer is almost always the same:

Motivation. They need motivation.

But the fact is, motivation is completely unreliable. If I only took my fish oil in the morning when I felt like it, I’d never take my fish oil because if you take a minute to think about putting two giant capsules of oil into your mouth just ‘ewwwwww.

I regret even writing about it because now I’m thinking about fish oil and trying not to throw up in my mouth.

The problem with relying on motivation is the blame and shame game that happens as a result of that line of thinking. Relying on your ability to feel like doing something makes everything your fault.

The most cringe-worthy line I hear from clients when we ask what we can do to better help and support them is:

“There’s nothing you can do – it’s me. I’m the problem. I just need to do better.”

Nooooooooooooooooooo! No. Nooo! All of the no’s you can find. Go out and round up every single no and that’s still not enough no’s.

The problem isn’t you. The problem is relying on the notion that you should always feel like doing something.

The solution?

Outsmarting motivation.

Most of us having periods in our lives when the motivation is a little higher, and September is often a time when, as we've written about before, we're riding a motivation wave.

So the best thing you can do if you're feeling that wave of energy right now?

Create your habits. Are you committed to taking your supplements? Awesome. Pair the action with another habit that is already hardwired into your daily routine. As soon as you put your toothbrush back in the holder, take your fish oil. As soon as you turn the coffee pot on, drink your first glass of water.

You get the idea.

The best thing that you can do for yourself when you feel like doing something is to build the routine. And that way when you no longer feel like doing something, it doesn't matter as much - because it's become a part of your routine.

And if you're struggling with any part of the process, we're here to help. You can always sit down with a coach and chat.

Be kind to yourself.